"And he's in a band. A rock band?"
"I know that. You were on your own. I really regret that, Katie."
"Catherine, I'm sorry, but I just find this very hard to believe."
"Can you tell me about it? The proof. I'm just curious."
"I would like to see a doctor called Doctor von Heimlich. Please, find one."
The Fantastic Four.Overall, I have been really pleased with the production that I'm currently in. The actors all get along really well, and for the first time (ever, I think), I am 100% confident in everybody's work onstage. For those of you who have done local theatre, I'm sure you've experienced those cringe-worthy moments when you know something is bad, but it is just never going to be fixed and you have to deal with it. I don't have that with this play. Not for one single second. The acting is strong, the set is wonderful, the direction is good. It all works. And I'm pretty harsh when it comes to shows I'm personally involved with, so saying that means alot. This week brought us our reviews and adjudication, and for the first time, I felt a bit deflated.
The problem is that reviews for local theatre aren't, technically, actual reviews. They're more like re-caps. They tell the readers a lot of what the play is about, hoping to lure people to the theatre I guess, but they don't say much about what is actually good or bad about a production. They focus on the positive, which is good, but gives you the feeling that they say nice things about every production. And that, of course, makes their opinion less...valuable? trustworthy? Who knows. And they're not necessarily written by people who know anything about theatre.
For example, our first review stated "The performances from the actors in this movie were raw and honest.", which is very complimentary - if we were in the movie. Gwyneth Paltrow and Anthony Hopkins were certainly good, but we are not them. Was that a typo? Or did she think she was seeing a movie? Or did she just rent the movie and pretend she saw the play??
Our second review was also positive, written by a blogger who usually reviews professional productions, but was somehow convinced to see our play. She definitely liked the show, but made a point of saying how it was unusual for "community" theatre to be so good. Kind of a back-handed compliment, no?
The third review was much better than it's predecessors, but made no mention of ME at all (except for the fact that I was, in fact, in the production), so OF COURSE I am all bitter and don't like it eventhough it was quite positive. Nyah. I'm so mature.
On Sunday, we had our adjudication for the ACT-CO awards. The winners in this festival remount the show in May and compete against other winning productions from different sectors. We were all incredibly nervous. I, for one, haven't done an adjudication since high school, and wasn't particularly keen on it. I'm incredibly proud of this show, and I have no desire for anyone to tell me all the things that are wrong with it.
All in all, it didn't go how I thought it would. The adjudicator seemed to like it, but criticized the pacing in the first act especially. He thought it was too fast and didn't give the actors time to react "in real time". I see his point - we were nervous and perhaps going a bit fast in Act 1 - but the work was all there, and so were the reactions. With a wordy play like this one, the pacing is crucial - go too slowly and it dies right there on the stage. I also thought he would have a more "bird's eye viewpoint" of the production. Talking with him was much like getting director's notes after a rehearsal. Instead of saying "I like how you reacted to that line", I thought it would be more of a "I liked/didn't like how you portrayed that character." Overall, I left the adjudication feeling uneasy, and even unsure if he liked it.
One week left. No matter what happens, I will be very sad when this show is over.
Cross-posted at Playdate
OK, so I know how you all are just DYING to find out how opening week for my play went. I'm sure it's hard to think of anything else. Seriously though, how do you stand going about your daily life without knowing? It must be hard. I really feel for you. So...kind person that I am, I decided to fill you in on all the details. You are so very, very lucky!
We started off the week with rehearsals every day - Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. By the time our last dress rehearsal rolled around, we were exhausted. And dying for a real audience.
Thursday was Opening Night. It was a large crowd filled with friendly people. There were members of East Side Players from past shows, the play reading committee and from the board. Cast and crew were each given complimentary tickets so each of us had a familiar face in the audience. For me, it was the Husband. Everyone LOVED the show. They are a bit biased, but still, they loved it. They loved it so much, in fact, that they found it uproariously funny. It was a bit disconcerting. We knew that there were moments with humour written into the script, but we had no idea it was a farce. It was interesting. And kind of fun. It erased my exhaustion for the time being.
There was a wine and cheese after the show, and we got to mingle with the audience. That was a lot more fun than I thought it was going to be. I usually don't like those kind of things at all, because I am very shy. But person after person came up to me telling me how much they enjoyed the show. I barely had time to eat, and had to make the Husband my fetch-and-carry boy because I was starving! A lot of the people who talked to me were East Side big-wigs, and I've been out of the loop for so long that I had no idea who they were, but had to pretend I did. Very awkward. Bad actor, bad!
The second night's audience was much more subdued. In reality, though, they were very good, and had the kind of response that I was actually expecting for the play. The show, for us, was technically much more smooth (there were a lot of quickly-covered goofs on opening), but our tiredness was starting to show. Everyone needed sleep.
Saturday night was the biggie for me. A bunch of my very favourite bloggirls got together and came to see the show. I was STUPENDOUSLY nervous. Here were a bunch of wonderfully articulate, intelligent, funny and nice women who have never seen me act. It's strange how your mom-life and your work-life can be very separate. What would they think? Would they like the show? I came face to face with the fact that it is one thing to say that you are an actor, and a very different thing altogether to actually have to prove that you can act. Luckily for me, it was a good night, and they seemed to have a good time. I KNOW I had a fantastic time at the bar afterwards. (And really, isn't it ALL ABOUT drinking at the bar afterwards? I'm not an alcoholic! Shut up! I only have trouble drinking when people ask me to stop...)
The Sunday matinée was a bit up and down for me. We had a great crowd. People love matinées for some reason. Me? I loathe them. I think it's weird to do a show when it's still light outside. This week, our matinee (March 1st) is being adjudicated for the ACTCO awards. The house is over-sold for that show. Gulp. Wish me luck. Or break a leg. Or bad rice. Whatever is en vogue these days. I just can't keep up anymore.
Cross posted at Playdate
And the expression pretty much sums up my state of mind for tomorrow's Opening Night.
Gulp.
They don't call it "Hell Week" for nothing.
Today was the start of a very long week for me. We were in the theatre all day posing as walking and talking props for the crew who are trying to work out the sound and lighting cues for the show. We've done Italian runs and lines runs and just plain running lines, but we haven't done an actual "acting" run in what seems like forever. Tomorrow night we do a Tech Run. Tuesday and Wednesday we do Dress Runs. Thursday, we open the show. And I'm starting to lose my nerve.
Hell, I HAVE lost my nerve.
I've been trying to figure out why.
The other night, while watching Americal Idol (Have you been watching this season? WOW. The singers are AWESOME. Truly exciting.), I finally got it. This means so much to me. More than ever before. I mean, a show opening is always important. Always. I'm not professional, but I try to conduct myself in all my productions as if I am.
I haven't done a show in four years. Four. Long. Years. And then some.
There are people coming to the show who have never seen me act. And that scares me. It scares the living crap out of me. It used to be the kind of thing that excited me, and now it has the exact opposite effect. It's one thing to say that you're an actor, and another thing entirely to prove that you are. People can only judge for themselves based on what they see, especially if they've never seen anything else.
But perhaps that is not exactly the crux of the matter. The fact is that this is the one thing I have right now that is just about me. No one else. And if I don't do this well, where does it leave me? Who am I? I mean, I can't tell you the number of times in the past few years that I have been referred to as C's mum, or just "Mum". Frequently. It's not bad. It's a badge I wear proudly. But one time, a while back, someone asked me what my name was, and I had to stop and think about it. I actually forgot for a second. Weird, huh? Who forgets their own name??
Not to mention that the whole transition to SHAM (uh, SAHM) has been much easier for the simple fact that I am in a play. I am enjoying my time at home because I know that it is balanced with an equal and opposite time away from home. A time without sticky fingers and snotty noses. As of March 7th, that will no longer be true. And that scares me too.
I want to be good. I want to prove the I have skills that don't involve organizing playdates and providing a variety of snack foods for endlessly empty stomachs. I want my family to be proud of me - even the two people who are too small to see the show. I want to renew my faith in myself as someone who has outside talents and interests. I want to make this time that I've spent away from my family, and the countless people that I've inconvenienced for it, worth it.
I want to find the nerve.
And I want this small person in my gut, the one who says I can't do it and I'll never be good enough - good, yes, but never good "enough" - to shut up and go away already. I am sick to death of listening to her. She is killing my buzz. Goodbye.
I am officially impressed. Painted Maypole does, like, four times the amount of shows that I do (or more) and yet she still finds time to post regularly. I'm having a hard time fitting it in. I get about an hour break a day (if the kidlets actually decide to nap), and by the time I finish running my lines, I have - at most - twenty minutes left. I usually fall asleep. Oh yes, I could post after the kids are in bed, but on the nights that I'm home, I'm pretty much a zombie by the time the kids are in bed. I veg out in front of the tv. I manage to watch one show before I konk out. It's sad.
Tonight, we're doing an Italian Run, which means we do all the dialogue and blocking, just really fast. (If anyone out there is Italian, please don't email all up in arms - that's what this kind of run is called. I didn't make it up). On Sunday, we finally move into the theatre. Yahoo! The stage won't be ready yet, so we're going to do a line run in the dressing room, and have our headshots done.
That's one thing that really bugs me about local theatres. I spent a whackload of money on professional headshots so that great lighting and a thick layer of makeup would make me look less scary than usual. And yet every show that I do insists that they have someone come in and take ANOTHER headshot, so that all the headshots look alike. Who cares if they look alike?? I just want to look good. I have three zits right now. I will not look good. I will look tired, old and spotted.
Anyways, Maypole wanted me to post more about the rehearsal process. I realized that I promised I would do that over at Playdate. I am Mama Drama after all. I've been sadly lax about that promise. So I posted the good stuff this week. All the gossip and the drama. Go have a read. I didn't work on my lines that day, so I could share the dirt.
So, you know I'm an actor, but did you know I'm in a play next month?
Well, now you do. No excuses.
It's been a long time since I've done show. A long time. I'm not sure I even remember how to act. (Sidenote: Ha! I couldn't even spell act! I kept typing "ackt".) It's good timing actually. Now that I'm home with the kids all day, I need an excuse to get out and have some "me" time. I often go to rehearsal with graham cracker sludge sticking to my clothes somewhere but - hey - still ME time. Just a dirtier version of me. And not in a good way.
Anyways, if you're in the Toronto area, would you like to come out and see it? I hope it's going to be good. If not, there's a bar up the hill and you can leave at intermission and go get hammered. That's where I usually spend intermission anyways. (Don't tell the stage manager.)
Moving on.
The super-fantabulous and always-busy-but-still-has-time-to-help-a-friend-out katie (motherbumper) has created this awesome button to help promote the show. I love the company I'm working with, but it's run by volunteers who don't always have the time to publicize the show as much as I would like. If you're coming to see the show, or even if you're not, and even if you don't live anywhere near Toronto, you can help us promote the bejeezers out of the show by posting the button on your sidebar. Word of mouth can do wonders. Support the arts! (Or hey, just read my post railing about arts cuts over at Playdate. It's fun.)
Who knows? Maybe there'll be so much press about the show that I will become rich and famous, and I can stop indulging my growing need for very cheap and very ugly purses that can pass as diaper bags. Please! Mr Earth will thank you! He hates carrying around the "rocker bags". Just ask him.
At long last, rehearsals for my show are finally underway. Do you remember that I auditioned back in June? Holy Moley that seems like a long time ago! For one thing, we weren't covered in a mountain of snow. [Public Service Announcement: Shovel your @#$% sidewalks! You know who you are. Don't make me come after you with this big chip on my shoulder. But I digress...]
I've had a lot of people ask me in amazed tones just how I do it - get up on stage in front of so many people, memorize all those lines, produce tears, etc. These questions always kind of take me aback, because I don't see it as any special talent - it's just what I do. I have always maintained that acting is 5% talent and 95% hard work.
Continue reading at Playdate
Last night we had our first "official" rehearsal. Well, technically, it wasn't a rehearsal at all - just a meet and greet and a read-thru of the play. I think that the director was concerned that since rehearsals don't actually start for FIVE MONTHS, that everyone would go their separate ways and forget about the fact that they'd been cast in a show. It is a good idea to get everyone excited about the project, so that they don't find something else "better" to do. (I'm all about "quotations" these days, even when they're not really necessary...).
They were going to schedule it for 7pm. I was like, uh, NO, I have an 8mth old baby who won't take a bottle and that is exactly the time that he wants to go to bed. In fact, "bedtime" (those damned quotations again) usually is a drawn out process that lasts until 8:30pm. They told me to bring him, but, yeah.....NO. I don't want a screaming baby at the rehearsal, and I doubt that anyone else did either. So they agreed to move the rehearsal to 8pm. Good! I thought. So, when I roll in at 8:15pm, I won't be too late. THEN they had the BRILLIANT (apparently, I'm liking CAPS too) idea to make everyone else come for 7:30pm, so that we would be ready to go at exactly 8pm. Of course, I was late. The read-thru didn't start till 8:27pm. I know, I looked at the stage manager's notes.
It went pretty well, all told. I think that it's going to be a strong show. Knock on wood. The girl who plays the lead is much better than I thought at the audition. Her only downside that I can see is that she is very real. Normally, that's the best thing that you can be, in my opinion, but on stage you need to compromise a tiny bit of the reality to make it dynamic and interesting. All told, though, it's not a bad fault to have and hopefully one that she can overcome easily. I bet she's awesome on film.
The dad is interesting. GREAT look. At times, I almost thought he looked like Anthony Hopkins, who played his role in the movie. He read the lines rather slower than I would like (I'm sleep deprived, and I really wanted to get home to my bed), but I think it's because he was really trying to invest some meaning in them, even at such a preliminary rehearsal.
The guy who plays Hal was quite good at first impression. I'd like to see what he does with the role to improve it.
As for me, well, I realized just how much of the play that I'm NOT in. Read-thrus are tough for the smaller characters. I have some great scenes, though, that I'm really excited to do. AND, when we start rehearsing for realz, I'll just be back at work with two small kids at home. I think a role that doesn't require me to be at every rehearsal will fit just perfectly into my life, and give me a chance to get my acting chops back up to snuff.
