Sunday, January 07, 2007

A Poetic Birthday Weekend

Yesterday, I used the gift Mr Earth got me for Christmas. I spent three hours (!) getting a facial, manicure and pedicure. Then I went downtown and spent an obscene amount of money on Mr Earth's credit card at my favourite lingerie shop on a single bra. It is ridiculous what these things cost nowadays when you want quality underpinnings. However, since I only buy a new bra about once every four years, maybe it's not so ridiculous...And it's a VERY nice bra. When I got home, Mr Earth took me out to one of my favourite restaurants, Scaramouche. I had red wine, three different kinds of goat cheese, scallops and flourless chocolate cake. It was heaven! Did I mention that the Boy stayed at Nana Earth's for the night?? You can guess what happened after dinner...

Unfortunately, the Boy's mysterious low-grade fever (which we thought was improving in the day) got worse in the evening. Thankfully, Nana Earth is very good with sick babies. She insisted we continue to enjoy our evening out when we called to check in. We left early in the morning to make the trek to Hamilton to see if we could get the Boy in to see a doctor. So, today, my actual birthday, I spent in a cramped, overcrowded walk-in clinic, cuddling a hot little body, and squeezed in between a horribly hacking large woman and a continuously burping little girl. It would be humourous if the Boy didn't look so sad. Thankfully, it seems to just be a fever (so far), not the ear infection that we feared. We have to go back to our doctor if it gets worse.

Mr Earth wrote me his usual birthday poem, and against his wishes*, I will post it for you all to read:

Now you have reached the age of thirty-four
Parties and late nights don't exist anymore

It's up and down with the Boy, and work in-between
With Happy Healthy Monsters and Mighty Machines

But at least you're learning things like how garbage moves along
Or the oh-so-catchy "street sweeping song"

One thing I'm sure, makes this year the best
As there's no more feeding to be done from the breast
(wow, that rhyme sucked, I'm getting worse in my old age)

So, it's boozing all day and boozing all night
As you're up to all hours making sure your blog is just right

Where you discuss important issues, from death to birth
Using your guise as NoMotherEarth

To continue the tradition we started at thirty-two
It's time for HAIKU!

34 - that's old
It is your mid-thirties now
Bad times, not good times

The Boy is older
No more little baby here
Only - "Don't Want To!!"

Grandparents save us
Gotta drop the Boy off soon
That's good parenting!

Family is great
And ours is a special one
You, me and the Boy

So have a great birthday, and know that I care
And maybe for my birthday, you won't wear any underwear??
Happy Birthday! All my love.

*Mr Earth would like to protest the publishing of this birthday poem. He has been very busy at work, and claims that this poem is not as well written as in other years.
**I love it because he wrote it. End of protest.


bubandpie said...

Oh my goodness, that is the best birthday tradition ever! I love it because (a) he mentions your blog, and (b) every haiku should end with the line, "That's good parenting!"

Kyla said...

Wow! That sounds like an amazing birthday!! I am SO jealous! Spa day, new lingerie, fancy food, dessert (hehe), a baby-less night, and poetry!

kittenpie said...

That's hilarous.
And that is one very good night, lady! Although I can sympathize if you enjoyed it a wee bit less for worrying about the fever. The timing is just never good for these things, is it?

metro mama said...

Wonderful poem!

I just turned 34 on dec 31st!

We really must get together soon.

Beck said...

Excellent birthday! I am now going to give MY husband a nasty look because he doesn't write ME birthday poems.

penelopeto said...

Happy birthday! I hit 32 on jan. 6.
the poem rocked.

ewe are here said...

Wow! You get poetry!? And a lovely birthday weekend?!

Someone's in trouble when he gets home from Vegas!

Suzanne said...

Happy Birthday! I love Mr Earth's poems. That plus the spa gift shows that he is indeed a class act.

PeanutButtersMum said...


i love the part where he talks about the end of breastfeeding and then says, "wow, that rhyme SUCKED." hahahahaha!

very punny.

something blue said...

I hope you had a wonderful birthday. Your husband is The Best!